This is probably a weird topic for Thanksgiving week, but bear with me. I have my reasons.
How often have I heard it?
You should journal.
Yeah, I probably should. I appreciate all the reasons why doing so would be good for me. But I just can’t. I know this from experience.
I tried to keep a travel journal once. It was a total fail. After college, my roommate and I had the privilege of taking a “Europe on $5 a day” experience. I was gifted a lovely travel journal before our trip. I was READY.
Entry 1:
Pages and pages of details as we sat on our first flight heading overseas. I was super excited, and I was going to capture it all.
Entry 2:
Oh no. I’m totally behind.
Bullet Point
Bullet point
Bullet Point
Entry 3:
F**k it. I can’t do this.
Long before that, even, I had one of those darling little diaries with the lock on it. You know, where I could put all my 10-year-old self’s super secrets? I found it as an adult … and my most compelling entry was a one-liner about how excited I was that it was a Mickey Mouse Club day.
So, my inability to journal is not new.
Start by keeping a Gratitude Journal
Hmmmm… that’s a thought. But no. Also a hard pass.
This one is easier to explain, however. It’s not about discipline. It’s not about an inability to feel grateful. In fact, it’s the exact opposite.
I live my life in a state of constant gratitude.
I am so grateful for my husband and the life we’ve created together.
I am grateful for my dog, my scruffy, adorable little monster.
I am grateful to have my sister and her family right around the corner.
I am grateful for my relationship with my niblings.
I am grateful that I had loving and supportive parents.
I am grateful for the most amazing girlfriends a woman could ask for.
I am grateful that I get to create art as my actual JOB.
I am grateful that I live in a Blue State.
I am grateful that we have excellent healthcare providers right in our area.
I am grateful, always, for my privilege.
I am grateful for my physical health – it’s not perfect, but it’s pretty darned good!
I am grateful for my mental health – and the meds that keep me strong.
I am grateful that I get to do what I love.
I am grateful for my fierce, beautiful, and strong portrait clients.
I wake up every day knowing I have a wonderful life. Even on cruddy days when I’m sad or anxious or unmotivated, these things are always with me. And I know that the darkness will pass and that I am oh-so-very lucky!
So, this is why I don’t keep a Gratitude Journal. I am an open book. My gratitude is written on my pages. Always.
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